Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
