Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
We're too hungover to prance.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize