I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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