question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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