Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
