you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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