Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
3 2 1 whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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