I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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