Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
