Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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