when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
