no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
