Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize