He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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