question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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