Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
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