It's Friday. Sex?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
