Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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