I just cut my nipple shaving
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
