Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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