i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize