I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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