omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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