i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Alive.
So much puke
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
