I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
