My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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