friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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