she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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