Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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