Welp...herpes.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
