Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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