its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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