Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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