Can Purell be used as lube?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
