I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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