whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
