I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
