NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
