The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
