Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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