I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
