Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
She's the barista slut.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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