Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517) 6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning. http://tfl.nu/t7a0
  Replies (2) Good night (1257) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you? http://tfl.nu/35zi
  Replies (12) Good night (2940) Bad night (1027)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it http://tfl.nu/tjsq
  Replies (4) Good night (2160) Bad night (964)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog

  (716): View more from New York

  do you not see the irony in that??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog (716): do you not see the irony in that?? http://tfl.nu/h8wi
  Replies (73) Good night (16330) Bad night (1279)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3 http://tfl.nu/5ewa
  Replies (22) Good night (5624) Bad night (780)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME. http://tfl.nu/1mf6
  Replies (94) Good night (18424) Bad night (2883)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty. http://tfl.nu/8sow
  Replies (8) Good night (5041) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood. http://tfl.nu/55rt
  Replies (14) Good night (5033) Bad night (1688)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night http://tfl.nu/y9wt
  Replies (19) Good night (4035) Bad night (1314)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away http://tfl.nu/dlah
  Replies (30) Good night (1807) Bad night (7837)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up http://tfl.nu/zwwo
  Replies (14) Good night (1155) Bad night (5809)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why. http://tfl.nu/ircc
  Replies (6) Good night (1703) Bad night (1051)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition http://tfl.nu/xug9
  Replies (0) Good night (1227) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (857): It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful. http://tfl.nu/xfy4
  Replies (9) Good night (2211) Bad night (1228)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette? http://tfl.nu/45gq
  Replies (17) Good night (1822) Bad night (961)

Randomize