Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize