whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
