it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
