Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
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Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
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Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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