What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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