I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize