Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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